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People ask me why do I go searching for other peoples lost dogs, is it for some reason, a mission. Its very simple, I now how it feels to lose your dog, its happened to me before and I can’t bear the thought of someone going through that. You feel helpless.
Yesterday I lost my girl, my Holly, and no amount of searching can change it, I feel helpless now. Holly, my loyal walking companion for 12 years has been put to sleep, her health catching up with her. The visible signs were there, blind, mostly deaf, weak back legs, but your dog cannot speak, whether she was suffering we’ll never know, have we done the right thing, we’ll never know.
Holly had been my faithful wallking pal over 12 years, in the Peak District, Yorkshire, Lake District, Monadliath, Cairngorms, Drumochter, Affric in all weathers. The memories of her chasing a mountain hare on Lochanagar, her wanderings freely on the hills, her coming back up the Torridon path countless times to check on me while I took photographs will stay with me. Losing her in Torridon on holiday when she fell between two large boulders trapped, missing overnight, I was distraught. But more so now, I cannot hold back the tears for my girl.
Her last hill walk with me was Ben Rinnes over a year ago in the snow, she was tired the next day, I knew then her hill walking days were numbered, she retired.
Since she lost her sight last summer, her walks have been different, she was always active, as all Springers are, but her tail no longer wagged when out. She didn’t have much of a tail, so her whole rear end would wag vigorously, now it only moved when she greeted you, as she always did.
Yesterday she was put to sleep, in my arms, she looked up at me one last time before slipping peacefully away.
I miss my girl.
This poem sums it all up.
If It Should Be
If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep
Then you must do what must be done
For this last battle can’t be won
You will be sad, I understand
But don’t let grief then stay your hand
For this day more than all the rest
Your love for me must stand the test
We’ve had so many happy years
What is to come can hold no fears
You don’t want me to suffer so
The time has come, please let me go
Take me where my needs they’ll tend
But please stay with me till the end
To hold me close and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see
I know in time you will agree
It was a kindness done for me
Although my tail its last has waved
From pain and suffering I’m saved
Please do not grieve that it was you
Who had this painful thing to do
We’ve been so close, we two, through the years
Don’t let your heart hold any tears
Some pics of my girl
