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I finally climbed my first Munro at the weekend and reached the top of Ben Vorlich.
- All set for the off.
Unfortunately, through no fault of the mountain, I can’t say I enjoyed it. The weather was glorious, my fitness was fine, I was well prepared and got up no bother but for the final 50 metres to the summit, which, as it transpires, is not a good place to discover that I can suffer from quite bad vertigo. I’ve done plenty of smaller hills before and although I’ve never been a big fan of drop offs or steep ascents I’ve managed them okay. However, on this occasion I really struggled on this final part of the climb and found it too steep for me with a bout of vertigo really kicking in. Leaving me feeling like I was going to get stuck up the mountain with visions of me having to be rescued! There was just a little snow lying that had fallen the night before but underneath that it was rocky and a bit wet and muddy…combined with the steepness of that final 50 metres I felt very insecure and at a real risk of slipping. Logically I knew that with confident steps and using my poles for support, the risk of falling was low and that if I had slipped I would most likely just have fallen on my bum and dented nothing more than my pride but in that moment, illogical or not, I felt like I really could just tumble off the mountain and felt myself getting dizzy and panicky. Doing it on my own did not help and in hindsight a bit silly for my first Munro but I’ve done lots of smaller hills before and always been fine. With my husband at home to watch the children it was me, myself and I or not at all. Having read several guides to the walk beforehand I felt that I would be okay with this ‘straightforward walk suitable for beginners’. And indeed it was very enjoyable and straightforward…most of the way.
- Stunning scenery of the way up.
- On the up - still happy at this point.
For most the final 50 metres to the top would be a walk in the park but for me it felt like a whole other ball game. On that final ascent I kept looking up at the two climbers about 20 feet in front of me to try and follow their path, hoping that they were taking the logical route up. It just seemed so steep! I also kept looking back down, desperate to turn around and head back – but I was stuck…dizzy, panicky and way out of my comfort zone. The only way was up because I couldn’t figure out how to get down! Hoping that when I got to the top I would take a few deep breaths, calm myself, shake off the excess adrenaline and figure out how to get down. Unfortunately I felt little joy at reaching the summit and I shamefully didn’t even register the inevitably stunning views on such a clear day. All I could think about was how the hell am I going to get off this mountain. I was fully prepared to slide down on my bum if needs be.
- At the top but not too happy about it.
Thankfully it was my lucky day and about 2 minutes after I got to the top a well weathered man reached the summit. He was on his own, looked experienced and very capable and I recognised him immediately as my ticket down the mountain. I told him I found the final ascent a bit intimidating and was worried about getting back down that first 50 metres. Turns out he used to be in the army, had done heaps of army training on the mountains, climbed all but a handful of Munros and was very well experienced in all things ‘mountain’ – I felt like I had won the lottery. We walked along the top ridge together (the ridge thankfully is lovely and wide so no vertigo there) and took some photos – all of which is a bit of a haze as I was still so worried about getting down.
- Trying to shake off the nerves and enjoy the view.
- Time to bite the bullet and head back down.
Thankfully this man knew a slightly easier way down the initial part of the descent, just slightly further along from where we had come up. It was less well trodden than the route I had taken up so I felt slightly more stable underfoot. I really don’t know how I would have fared trying to go back down the way I came up if I had been on my own. My new friend (never found out his name which is a shame) was so confident that he just started going, rather fast (using his poles as extra feet that he was swinging off) and I had no choice but to follow or be left behind to do it on my own. Once he realised how slow I was actually going to be he very kindly waited on me and stayed never too far in front of me for those first few metres of the descent. After we had got down about 50 metres I could feel myself relaxing. If I was to fall now the furthest I would fall would be a few feet (not to say that I wouldn’t do myself a damage but my fear was with the steepness of the gradient and as the gradient reduced so did my sense of panic and impending doom). My new friend told me that the final few metres was steep enough to be justified in feeling a bit nervous if you are not used to it, especially when the conditions were deceptively slippy underfoot (maybe he was just saying that to be kind!). So I feel a little less silly for getting a bit panicky. However, my fear definitely peaked higher than was justified. I’m so glad I found my new friend on the mountain and didn’t embarrass myself. If I had tried to get down on my own and then panicked it could have been, at the very least, highly embarrassing and at worst, downright dangerous. My new friend and I stayed together for the remainder of the walk back down to Ardvorlich (even though I reassured him I would do my best to make it back in one piece after that initial descent was over) I really enjoyed his company and interrogated him for his top hill walking tips and bombarding him with questions to hear all about his experiences in the mountains. If he happens to read this I’m sure he will recognise himself and I would once again like to thank him for his patience and reassurance.
So that’s it, my first Munro – done. Potentially my first and last Munro – certainly the last one I’ll do on my own. I didn’t go in to this walk under prepared. I am physically fit, I researched the route beforehand, checked that it was suitable for a first timer and took the proper equipment. But I did underestimate how challenging a ‘beginner’ Munro would still be, certainly underestimated how even just a small covering of snow could make navigating a path up much more difficult and didn’t even consider beforehand the chances of experiencing vertigo. Like I said earlier, I’ve done high walks before but for whatever reason, on this occasion, maybe the feeling of being unstable underfoot or because I was on my own, the final ascent just felt too steep. I like to believe that I would have fared much better if I could have replaced the snow for a companion. Now that I am back down to ground level of course, I feel a bit silly about how panicked and trapped I felt and it’s something I feel scared about experiencing again. I am going to have to try and gain a better head for heights if I want to continue on my Munro adventures!